What if leadership didn’t ask you to become someone else but invited you to lead as you are, with your sensitivity, care, and quiet conviction?
That question stayed with me as I read A Different Kind of Power, Jacinda Ardern’s memoir. I had admired her leadership from afar – the compassion she brought into crises, the steadiness behind her public presence – and picked up the book hoping to glimpse the thought process behind it. What I found was something far more intimate and validating.
Jacinda Ardern served as Prime Minister of New Zealand from 2017 to 2023. She led through major global and national crises – from the Christchurch mosque attacks to the pandemic – with what many considered a radically different style: one that centered kindness, presence, and conviction. Time and again, she refused to choose between being a good human and a strong decision maker. And yet, in the early pages of her memoir, she confesses:
“I wasn’t tough enough to become an actual politician. My elbows weren’t sharp enough; my skin was too thin.”
That deep self-doubt – the feeling that your sensitivity disqualifies you from leadership – is one so many of us know well. Especially for women who lead with empathy, relational strength, or moral clarity, it’s easy to believe we are somehow “not enough.” This isn’t about aspiring to political office. For many of us, leadership doesn’t come with a podium or public title. But in our homes, our work, our communities and in the quiet choices we make every day, we are leading.
Jacinda’s story gently upends the belief that only a certain kind of person qualifies for leadership. It invites us to reclaim it on our own terms. Her memoir is a book well worth reading — not just for what it reveals about Jacinda, but for how deeply it reflects the quiet struggles and strengths many women carry.
Among many other insightful reflections on her leadership, Jacinda also writes candidly about her pregnancy during her prime ministership – the nausea behind closed doors, the public scrutiny, the guilt of being absent at home and stretched thin at work.
“I did what countless women do every day – tucked away whatever was going on for me privately and got on with it.”
So many of us carry that invisible labor. We hold it all – the work, the care, the dreams, the worry – and often feel we must do so without showing any cracks. Her openness about her vulnerability doesn’t just normalize the struggle. It dignifies it, offering other women a powerful reminder that being honest about what we carry doesn’t diminish our capability.
Throughout her prime ministership, Jacinda led from a quiet strength that allowed her to root her leadership in who she truly was and not in what the world demanded her to be.
This memoir isn’t just about Jacinda Ardern. It’s about us. It reminds us that the capacity for leadership, for boldness aligned with empathy, for quiet power – already lives within us. It inspires us to become clear about our deepest truth, our values and purpose, and to honor and express them boldly in how we lead.
If something in her story or in this reflection stirred something in you, I invite you to consider working with me. I’m creating transformational programs for Indian-origin women who are ready to move from inner hesitation into bold, aligned expression of their purpose and leadership. It’s not about fixing yourself. It’s about trusting yourself – and taking the steps that reflect who you truly are.
Write to gayathri@empowria.com for more.